Where's the sense in that?

Nonsensical Promises that Attract a Handful of Customers are Seldom Worth the Sales

By Stafford Sterner -- Industrial Distribution, 10/1/2005

In the world of business, there seems to be a spreading epidemic: lack of common sense. Something once thought to be evident in everyone has become surprisingly rare. Actually, not just people but some businesses fall into this category.

These are the businesses that make ridiculous promises in order to get business. Example: I was standing in a fast food restaurant reading a sign promising a free beverage if an order took longer than 60 seconds to serve. The man in front of me was angry because his order had taken perhaps 65 seconds, and he was being refused the free drink. Sixty-five seconds is still fast, but this man was enraged that his order had been "late," and that the manager was trying to back out of the company's promise. Here, the company had raised the customer's expectations to a level that it couldn't satisfy.

There may have been some slight advantage to the claim in the beginning—attracting a few customers who placed a particularly high value on a few seconds of their precious time—but the ultimate result, on this day, was a loud, public exhibition from an unhappy customer.

What can businesses do to avoid getting themselves into this situation?

First of all, they can realize that long-term customer relationships are advantageous to both parties. Signing a new customer is glamorous, but the cost of selling is high. From the customer's point of view, a new supplier may cut you a deal to get your business, but will you save enough to pay the cost of selecting and certifying a new supplier—not to mention the risks of doing business with an unknown supplier?

Second, they can tell the hard truth that there is no such thing as fast, cheap quality. Every customer, and every deal, prioritizes those qualities differently, and there is no wrong order. However, any supplier that promises top priority to all three is lying, all in order to start a customer relationship that is bound to fail in the end.

Third, they can make very clear the rules under which they intend to do business. Warning labels, contracts, bills of lading, warranties, policies and promotional materials should all be written clearly and boldly. It is hard enough today to enforce a clear and reasonable contract, let alone one that can be interpreted as misleading.

Finally, they can stand by the rules of the relationship. You can't build a relationship of trust or mutual advantage with people that sue because their coffee is too hot, or explain that a signed bill of lading means nothing because they don't have anybody on the loading dock qualified to check a shipment.

The way I figure it, with the time and money we save by avoiding nonsensical promises and the customers they attract, we can turn our attention to our real customers, the ones from which we can make an honest living.